


Fifty Places Jack and Daniel Got It On

by Catspaw



Series: Sixty-five Things [2]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-06
Updated: 2011-05-06
Packaged: 2017-10-19 01:42:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/195489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Catspaw/pseuds/Catspaw
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One of a bundle of 'five things' challenges.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fifty Places Jack and Daniel Got It On

Jack and Daniel both looked at their watches.

"On my mark: three, two, one, mark." Jack took a deep breath. "In no particular order: in a tent on P3X-555, behind a wall on that boring ball of mud whose designation I can't remember, in your car, in my car, at my place..."

"Good start, but I'm still not convinced you can do it."

"Stop trying to put me off, I'm on a roll here. 'My place' includes the hall, the bathroom, floor _and_ shower so that's another two. There's the couch, the kitchen - and that's over the table, against the fridge and on the floor, so there's another three right there."

Jack had run out of fingers so he snagged the newspaper and a ballpoint, and proceeded to make tally marks along the top edge of one page as he carried on with his list. "Your living room, floor and couch, your bathroom floor, your shower, up against your front door, up against _my_ front door, on your balcony in a thunderstorm, on my deck last fourth of July, in the car lot at Red Robin last Thursday -- I make that twenty so far, right off the top of my head."

Daniel held up one hand. "Okay, maybe you _can_ list fifty different places. No way you'll do it in any less than four minutes though."

"No 'maybe' about it, and no worries about the time frame here either. The dock at the cabin, the woods behind the cabin, the bed in the cabin, the floor in front of the fire in the cabin, in the boat in the middle of the lake, in the lake after you pushed me in. Twenty-six, over half way and still going strong. Now let's think about on base. The storage room on level 27, VIP suite on level 25, supply room on level 24. The gate room, the briefing room --"

"What?"

Jack nodded. "During that Groundhog Day fiasco."

Daniel was indignant. "You can't count anything during the time loop. I can't remember, so you've no corroborating evidence."

"'Course I can," Jack avowed. "The bet was that I couldn't name fifty places we'd gotten it on. The gate room and the briefing room are both places. We got it on in those places. I told you about it just about as soon as the loops had finished. And that might be hearsay, but it's hearsay with provenance because you accepted it at the time."

"I'm not sure _that_ would stand up in a court of law--"

"It would stand up in a debrief. Plus you didn't specify any time/space reference. They both count."

"But --"

Jack treated Daniel to a level stare from under lowered brows. "They _count_."

Daniel subsided to rest his head on the back of the couch and sighed at the ceiling. "Okay, go on."

Jack gave a satisfied 'huff', point proven. "Okay. Now where was I?"

There was a long pause, long enough for Daniel to start wondering if he might actually be on a winner here. When he looked for confirmation though, what he saw was Jack sitting, staring glazed-eyed in his direction, with a wicked smirk on his face.

"What?"

"What?" Jack visibly adjusted to the here and now.

"You stuck?"

The wicked smirk broadened into a wolfish grin.

"No-oo. I was just thinking about the armoury. And that nasty little gun kink you'd been hiding so well up 'til then."

Daniel didn't often blush, but memories of that one made him distinctly warm all over. _Not blushing, per se_ , he privately justified himself as he returned to staring at the ceiling again. _Just reminiscing. Jack and guns are a hot combination._ And he wasn't surprised to find that his dick was agreeing with him.

Jack cleared his throat noisily and resumed his list. "Ooo-kay, moving on. Other ordnance: one al-kesh, two different death gliders and a hatak vessel." He paused again for a moment, face screwed up in thought. "Nope, can't think of anything else for this category. So, let's consider off world again. Jona's bunk, Carlin's bunk--"

"Objection. You can't count that, we didn't know who we were."

"Terms of the bet said nothing about being in our right minds, Daniel," Jack said smugly. "And we both remembered what happened. If you're allowing the time loop, you have to allow this. Oh, and the boiler room or whatever that damn place was. That place where we went to 'talk' about the flashbacks we were having," Jack made air quotes with his fingers around the word 'talk'. "Didn't quite turn out that way, even if we did do some talking too. Then there was that planet where you had to do that weird-ass jerk off ritual over the altar and you jerked me up against a tree after I'd gotten blue balls watching you."

"That one was a bit one-sided. Not sure you can count that one either."

"Hey, it wasn't _my_ hand that did all the work," Jack replied.

Daniel considered for a moment, then conceded. "Point."

"Good. That gets me up to, let's see now, forty. Ten to go. That time we had to put on a show for some pervy aliens."

Daniel snorted his derision. "In your dreams."

Jack paused a moment, head cocked to one side, frowning slightly. "Oh yeah. You're right. That _was_ a dream. Okay, stick that one on the 'to do' list."

"Oh, god," Daniel chuckled.

"Next up, hotels we've stayed in. D.C., Turkey, Egypt, Chicago. I guess Goa'uld Pleasure Palace maybe falls into this category too. And I can definitely count it three times --"

"I'd probably allow that for sheer quantity alone," Daniel interjected drily, nodding.

"That too. But we're going for variety here, not frequency. We mostly used that squishy, not-water bed thing but there was that one time on the beach and several times on the balcony with the built-in, tingly-force-field toys. They were _great_ ; it's a shame we broke them," Jack added, slightly wistfully, as Daniel nodded agreement.

"And finally," Jack said, noting his last flurry of tally marks on the paper with a triumphant flourish and a quick scrutiny of his wristwatch, "my bed and your bed. I saved the easy ones 'til last. And I make that three minutes fifty-eight."

Daniel craned his neck to look over at Jack's paper. "That's only forty-nine."

Jack clicked his ballpoint shut and very precisely placed it and the paper on the coffee table before turning around to look Daniel in the face.

"And where are we now?" His voice was warm, dark velvet as he leaned into Daniel's space.

"Sitting on your couch. And I see where you're going with this, but you've already had couch." Daniel eased forward to meet him half way. "You can't have it again, so you're still only up to forty-nine."

"Sitting on my _new_ couch, Daniel," Jack corrected gently as he reached out and carefully took Daniel's glasses off.

Daniel considered splitting hairs for the fraction of a second his eyes took to flick down at the growing bulge in Jack's jeans. And decided against it.

"Okay. You win. Fifty it is," he agreed as he closed the distance between them. "So I guess I'm pitching. Again."


End file.
